As I sit here in my spider-man outfit, complete with mask, a thought occurs to me, Hey it's Halloween. I guess I'll have to put away my everyday spider-man suit and break out the special occasion one. Even if that was true, I'm sure I wouldn't be the first person ever to post something on the Internet while dressed as spider-man. For some reason I imagine director Kevin Smith dressed that way as he posts on his website. To make up for that quasi insult here's a free plug. Zach and Miri Make a Porno, opening in theatres today. There, now at least 6 people know about his movie.
Anyways, getting back to the topic of Halloween, I've never been a big fan. I like the idea of going out and getting candy for very little effort but I'm not so much into the scary aspect. I don't generally watch scary movies and I've never been one for scary costumes. As a kid, I generally dressed up as super heroes for Halloween. One year I got brave and decided to be a vampire. The idea of wearing a cape was the big selling point for me. The big drawback was the fake blood. When it came time to put it on, I had a meltdown. Mom is standing there with a tube of fake blood as I'm crying in the corner trying to keep her away (let me take this opportunity to point out I was 8) while my little sister is laughing her ass off. It didn't take too long to realise the makeup was a lost cause so I went trick or treating as the world's first hemophobic vampire. More of a concept costume than anything else. Needless to say, that little childhood trauma has soured me on Halloween. I'm doing my best not to pass that on to the kids though.
They're both excited about dressing up in costumes. They enjoy candy too. It's having all sorts of ghosts and ghouls roaming the street that I think may present a challenge. I'll try not to be scared though. Both girls like their costumes so much that it'd be a shame for it to go poorly. The little one is a butterfly, or buttaby as she says, and her big sister is a witch. She picked it out herself. That came as a bit of a relief. We got a flyer in the mailbox from some costume place a couple weeks ago. She was looking at all the costumes that were shown on the cover and telling me what they were. "She's a ballerina. That one's a cowgirl. She's a princess. She's a fairy." The problem is they were grown up costumes and all I could think was that's great but they all look like hookers to me. If that's the direction Halloween is heading then I'm not looking forward to her selecting costumes when she's older.
What's wrong with the costumes they had when I was a kid anyway? You throw on a plastic pullover Batman, Superman, or Lone Ranger costume, put that flimsy plastic mask with eye, mouth, and nostril holes on (careful not to snap the elastic string that held it in place) and you're good to go. Head out to collect a garbage bag sized sack full of sugarbetes batter. Ah, the good old days. The 80's were a simpler time. Oh well, the costumes may have changed but at least I can count on my kids going out and feeding my sweet tooth tonight. "Yeah, that candy isn't the kind you like. And that one you're allergic too. Oh, that one made you sick the last time you had it. Here, you love trail mix. Make sure to share with your sister."
9 years ago